Saturday, May 27, 2006

I wish I knew a prayer...

Yesterday one of my employee's, A.E., received an urgent call from her sister. She had been in the middle of doing some paperwork and as soon as she got off the phone, she dropped her stuff on the floor and said that she had to go home. I knew that the news must have been about her Mom. By the time I got to her, she was crying so hard that I was afraid she was going to pass out - she is Asthmatic and has some other kind of lung disease.
I was trying to comfort her and ask her if her Mom had passed away. She said that her sister told her that she needed to come home, immediately. A.E's Mom has been really ill over the last month or so and they had only given her 2 months to live. I was hoping that her Mom was not gone, so that A.E. would have a chance to say her final goodbye.
Trying to calm her down was not working at all and by the time she walked to her car, she was almost hysterical. I told her to stay right there and I would drive her to her sister's house. I certainly didn't think that it would be safe for her to be on the road in her condition. Initially, she was saying that she would be ok, but finally she accepted my offer. I ran in the office, grabbed my stuff and ran back to my car.
On the way there, I tried to comfort her as best I could, but I really didn't know what to say. Aside from checking to make sure that she had enough air and trying to keep her talking, I felt pretty useless. I was searching for something, anything, comforting to say and the best that I could up with was some gibberish about me not wanting to run over people while I was racing her home to be with her family. I did get a half a laugh out of her. - I know it's not much, but sometimes it helps.

At the same time, I was wishing that I new a prayer that I could pray with/for her. Something that would comfort her or give her strength to deal with whatever she was about to face. I had nothing... No words of wisdom, no psalms - only quick wit, which is so obviously useless in the situation at hand.
When we arrived at the house her sister came out crying and stated "at least she's not in pain anymore..." I made sure A.E. had all of her stuff, hugged them both and then I was on my way back to the office as if nothing happened.
On the way back, I was thinking how pitiful it is that I don't know one single prayer. I mean, I do know one that starts out "God is great. God is good....", somehow I just don't think that that one would have worked. How sad. I went to private Catholic school from k-12 and what do I have to show for it?? How did I side-step religion for all those years?? My Mom has never been big on church and truth be told, if I hadn't gone to church in school, I would have rarely, if ever, gone. I don't attend church now and feel little need to. Don't get me wrong, every once in a while I will go to church with friends who have invited me, but I'm not above declining and I have on several occasions.

I think I will see that my future children go to church on a somewhat regular basis... even if I have to send them with someone else. I want them to have the foundation that I missed out on.


10 Comments:

Blogger TRUTHZ said...

just you driving her to her sister's home was a lot...it may seem small but believe me, you showed her that in her darkest hour she had a friend in you..(sounds corny but its true) think about how many other people would have let her drive their by herself.

and when people think of praying they think it is some formality that needs to be followed...the best prayers I have heard and done myself are the ones that shoot straight from the gut...the ones that expose what's in the heart...so something just asking God to give her the strength to endure what lied ahead of her, to give her the courage to continue on, and just to be with her in her time of need would have been fine...

8:26 PM  
Blogger Organized Noise said...

I was just stopping by to thank you for the birthday shout out. Wasn't really expecting this.

I don't really know how to console someone in time of death. Like yourself, I like to laugh my way through it. I try my best to be there for people - being a shoulder to cry on, someone to talk to - but prayers were just not my thing. That was before my surgery - back in 1999.

When I came out of surgery, my girlfriend at the time gave me a card with the Serenity Prayer on it:

God

Grant me the sernity to accept the things I cannot change . . .

Courage to change the things I can . . .

And wisdom to know the difference

I have yet to find a situation in which this prayer cannot be used.

7:11 AM  
Blogger TRUTHZ said...

hey, hope everything is okay...

6:38 PM  
Blogger Ms.Behavin said...

@Truthz: I guess I do feel as though prayer needs to be some big formal to-do... Thanks for the support & for checkin' on me! ;-) I've been fine, just busy... somebody forgot to tell these MFfers at work that slavery is over!!

@O.N.: Thanks for the Serenity Prayer!! I'm sure that will come in handy! I'm glad you had a good BDay

@ Dee: Thanks for the encouragement!!!

1:27 PM  
Blogger Ms.Honey said...

as truthz stated just being able to be there for her while she was at work and then taking the time to drive her home made the difference that's what she will remember.

Just talk to God like you talk to others...he knows your heart

8:36 AM  
Blogger djn said...

You are such a wonderful person to just drop everything and be present. I love that and not everyone has that quality. I think God would rather have a conversation with you rather than a memorized line... Just my thought. And I think your caring & positivity is more powerful than anything.

9:20 PM  
Blogger Emotionalbrotha said...

Baby girl, sometimes prayer isn't everything.. i think your presence and just being there for the sister is more powerful than anything that could be said in that circumstance.

10:02 PM  
Blogger sweetness said...

prayer come from with in. prayer is based on ur relationship with God. prayer is from the heart. yes there are some prayers that's been copywritten. but the holy spirit live in u and is yet alive. the power is in u not the church or relegion.
once u tune in to that holy spirit that live in u.God will let the words flow. if u want we could be prayin prayers.

8:57 AM  
Blogger sweetness said...

sorry my last sentence was we could be prayin partners

8:57 AM  
Blogger Ms.Behavin said...

Thank you for all of your encouraging words. As you could probably tell, I was little freaked out by that situation w/ A.E.'s Mom.

@Sweetness - I wouldn't even know where to begin...

8:16 PM  

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